Replies Considered And Rejected In Response to An Email From My Manager Just Now, Wondering Whether I Can "Just Go Ahead And Put Together These Packets" For Tomorrow's 3-Hour Meeting, Given The "weight of this project in terms of its scale and importance," Because The 26-Year-Old Blue-Flame Meeting/Project Lead Doesn't Need To Be "Overly Burdened" By Doing It Himself
--Oh yes, absolutely, my calendar's completely open except for that massive deliverable you already laid on me today that I have to finish before I leave.
--Yeah, no problem -- I actually went to grad school for the specific purpose of adding grim irony to performing such tasks as printing and photocopying 40-page "packets."
--For sure -- happy to free up some time for Blue Flame. He's so terribly busy outranking me by two job levels while Facebooking, harassing people via transatlantic phone call and chatting up the new gal, I'd hate to burden the poor dear.
--So am I to assume you actually realize the "weight of this project in terms of its scale and importance," then? Huh. That's funny. I recall the entire area with which this big meeting is concerned being left off my 2010 goals until I myself pointed it out. But sure, I'm on it. Top priority.
--Actually, this is beyond the scope of my core competencies at this time, but if you'd like to loop back with me on it later, we can schedule some time on our calendars for a touch-base with our Sr. Manager and HR to discuss the matter in depth and create an action plan so that I can get up to speed and really own this piece.
--Or, how about this: Blue Flame can fucking do it himself since it's his idea and he'll get credit for it anyway?
--Why don't you get your mom to do it? I hear she likes that sort of thing.
Labels: balls in YOUR mouth sir, cubejammin', first-world problems, I really am sort of an asshole sometimes, pigeon/statue, that's what your mom said, way too old for this kind of shit anymore