Two weeks later, just before the old world ended, Miranda stood on a beach on the coast of Malaysia looking out at the sea.

Anybody else gettin that end-of-days feeling? That thing where you perceive a slight list in the decks on the metaphorical Titanic, juuuuuuuust enough that it's like one side of your body is working a little harder than the other, and but instead of the ship righting itself, and shifting the other way, the list keeps becoming more pronounced?

For all my joking around about apocalypses being my jam, I reeeeallly wasn't wanting to have to participate in one, but here I am -- trying to figure out what to do when (not if) my kids' schools are closed indefinitely, wondering how many sacks of dried beans I can buy without looking like a nut, going to gas up the car in case there's a supply issue, going ahead and booking that goddamn Disney trip for next month because fuck it what the hell idk man (but not telling the kids so I won't have to deal with the fallout if we cancel, and for DAMN sure reading the T&C on cancellation/rebooking before I hit purchase), avoiding my ILs (who are in their mid-80s and whom I love and do not wish to straight-up murder with germs), still going to the gym because I will lose my FUCKING MIND if I can't (working out is one of the two things tethering my frayed and battered sanity to my soul; the other is Pokemon GO), and, of course, thinking about how much reading and binge-watching time we'll have if we're confined to our house for the duration. All Mr. Gleemonex and I keep saying to each other is "WTF are we supposed to do, huh? Guess we'll ... [current plan for whatever specific issue / activity may or may not be happening bc plague]."

The elementary school this morning was a ghost town -- probably 25%, maybe more -- of the kids are preemptively being held out, and everybody who was there was playing Plague Tag (aka running all over the playground shrieking "CORONAVIRUSSSSS!" at each other and trying to slap-tag each other). Some douche in my kid's classroom said "It's only girls that have it!" and there was about a solid 10 minutes of uproar until the teacher hollered them all down. Bless, bless.

lol this post from 2009 didn't age well did it.