You KNOW bin Laden had to've enjoyed gettin orange slices after soccer practice!

Abe Kanan and Rodney Mullen Are Awesome For Entirely Different Reasons

1. Abe Kanan: I have the Stern channels on Sirius in my new pimpmobile, so I am finally getting to hear not only Stern but also my new discovery, the Abe Kanan show. It is f'ing HYSTERICAL. They just talk about stuff (sharks, Rottweilers, Abe Lincoln), and when you try to tell your fellow Stern/Kanan fanboy of a husband what they were talking about, it kind of dies in the translation, but OMFG I thought I might have a stroke in the Whole Foods parking lot the other day when they were talking about dictators' and other maniacs' adolescences -- "Was Hitler, like, always a dick? Or did he get book-checked a lot in the hallways at school and that's what MADE him a dick?" "Bin Laden musta been a little bit cool, he was 6'7" and played soccer -- when he was a kid you KNOW he had to've enjoyed gettin orange slices after soccer practice!" See? You're not dying of laughter -- but if you heard these guys say it, you would be.

2. Rodney Mullen: Holy skinny, wiry Shatner would I have been an annoying skate nerd back in the day if I had any notion that this world existed. I've come to know about Bones Brigade from Mr. Gleemonex, who WAS into this stuff back in the day; this weekend, we watched the 2012 Bones Brigade autobiography Stacy Peralta made -- it was absolutely fascinating. This feels like how I got into the Pixies around age 30, since I missed them almost entirely the first time around (would have been a full 100% cultural miss if not for the Pump Up the Volume soundtrack -- but now I play bass because of Kim Deal and kind of almost might someday get a tattoo of their logo). And while I have written here before about Tony Hawk, whom I continue to love, I gotta tellya, I'm developing quite a Thing for Rodney Mullen (at least the current incarnation of him, all bedraggled and wistful and strange and reflective, beautiful like a musician over a mind like David Foster Wallace or some shit). He is so goddamned interesting, and I can't figure him out, and that's sofa king cool, man.