He's kinda tall, sorta. He has ... hair. And he wears T-shirts sometimes.
Internets: Hey, Gleemonex. Long time no blog, eh? Whatcha thinkin today?
Gleemonex: What up, Internets! Been working like a bastard, but in between times, I've been hitting refresh on a Letter to the Editor in Ye Olde Hometowne Newspaper--
Internets: Stirring the shit again, eh?
Gleemonex: Naturally. You know me too well.
Internets: What's your beef this time?
Gleemonex: Some retard wrote in to say the paper "decided to let the words of this black lady columnist, Mrs. Edelman, take up space concerning healthcare for children" --
Internets: Wait, that's a direct quote?
Gleemonex: Oh yeah.
Internets: Wha--
Gleemonex: I know. And so but anyway, this person "couldn't help but comment"--
Internets: They never can.
Gleemonex: Ain't that the truth. So our pal Chucky the Study Buddy opines that "they" want "a chicken in every pot, even if you didn't work to get it"--
Internets: Oh, come ON!
Gleemonex: Please. May I? ANYway. And besides, our healthcare system isn't perfect, he allows generously, but: "Is it better than anybody else in the world's socialized healthcare liberals and weinie-washer leftwingers want us to adopt in our nation? Undeniably."
Internets: Un. de. NI! ably.
Gleemonex: Hee. I know. And as a liberal, I definitely "want to continually find ways to rape [Lee Greenwood's Genius Cousin] with more taxation without representation."
Internets: Oh, but of course -- EVERYBODY knows that.
Gleemonex: And he closes with this shazammy-shazinger: "Healthcare is a privilege, not your right."
Internets: ...
Gleemonex: I just blew your mind, didn't I?
Internets: FATAL ERROR. CLOSE ALL WINDOWS AND REBOOT.
Gleemonex: Exactly. So I replied, basically saying "Pull your head out of your ass," but in more words and specifically without the words ass or total fucking retard involved --
Internets: Mighty polite of you.
Gleemonex: I thought so.
Internets: But they're still never going to allow your comment through, are they?
Gleemonex: Nope.
Internets: [sigh] Sorry about that. Some people, you know?
Gleemonex: True dat. But at least, even in your darkest moments, you give me something to love -- for example, you're there when Prince Philip gets off a good one.
Internets: One of my faves! Say thanks to Alison for me, wouldja?
Gleemonex: That I will.
Gleemonex: What up, Internets! Been working like a bastard, but in between times, I've been hitting refresh on a Letter to the Editor in Ye Olde Hometowne Newspaper--
Internets: Stirring the shit again, eh?
Gleemonex: Naturally. You know me too well.
Internets: What's your beef this time?
Gleemonex: Some retard wrote in to say the paper "decided to let the words of this black lady columnist, Mrs. Edelman, take up space concerning healthcare for children" --
Internets: Wait, that's a direct quote?
Gleemonex: Oh yeah.
Internets: Wha--
Gleemonex: I know. And so but anyway, this person "couldn't help but comment"--
Internets: They never can.
Gleemonex: Ain't that the truth. So our pal Chucky the Study Buddy opines that "they" want "a chicken in every pot, even if you didn't work to get it"--
Internets: Oh, come ON!
Gleemonex: Please. May I? ANYway. And besides, our healthcare system isn't perfect, he allows generously, but: "Is it better than anybody else in the world's socialized healthcare liberals and weinie-washer leftwingers want us to adopt in our nation? Undeniably."
Internets: Un. de. NI! ably.
Gleemonex: Hee. I know. And as a liberal, I definitely "want to continually find ways to rape [Lee Greenwood's Genius Cousin] with more taxation without representation."
Internets: Oh, but of course -- EVERYBODY knows that.
Gleemonex: And he closes with this shazammy-shazinger: "Healthcare is a privilege, not your right."
Internets: ...
Gleemonex: I just blew your mind, didn't I?
Internets: FATAL ERROR. CLOSE ALL WINDOWS AND REBOOT.
Gleemonex: Exactly. So I replied, basically saying "Pull your head out of your ass," but in more words and specifically without the words ass or total fucking retard involved --
Internets: Mighty polite of you.
Gleemonex: I thought so.
Internets: But they're still never going to allow your comment through, are they?
Gleemonex: Nope.
Internets: [sigh] Sorry about that. Some people, you know?
Gleemonex: True dat. But at least, even in your darkest moments, you give me something to love -- for example, you're there when Prince Philip gets off a good one.
Internets: One of my faves! Say thanks to Alison for me, wouldja?
Gleemonex: That I will.
Labels: balls in YOUR mouth sir, christ on toast points -- politics, cryin' amazacrazy, Lookee what the Internets done brung me today, teabaggin
posted by Gleemonex at 4:37 PM
4 Comments:
Yeah, but he's Preston. PRESTOOOONNNEEE.
ps. You're hilarious.
I love it when you talk to yourself...I mean, us. It cracks me up. Does "Ye Olde Hometowne" not have an alternative news source that would print enlightened material, or am I just spitting into the wind there?
Anyway, can I be friends with Alison? I just ventured over to her blog and obviously she's a Star Wars fan and I may/may not have a crush on Daniel Craig too...so I think we would really hit it off.
WEINIE WASHER!
You're welcome, Internets.
Alison
Oh, and I'd dearly love to see even the fucking-retard-free version of your letter to the editor. Truly I would.
P.S. Slugger, for sure, we can hang out.
Post a Comment
<< Home