Thought paella
DRIVE MY CAR INTO THE OCEAN
Waiting for the bus this a.m., I saw a guy go by in a tiny little low-slung, obviously brand-new two-seater Porsche convertible. Riding in the passenger side: a garishly-upholstered carseat, correctly strapped in and clearly well-used (no child in it at the moment of sighting). Who in that life situation (parent of very young child) would buy such a vehicle? Well, I know why (DENIAL), but then why use it as the transpo for said child? Aren't those cars manufactured and marketed specifically as cruising vessels for picking up chicks, and wouldn’t it kind of ruin your chick-gathering mojo to have a Cheerio-covered carseat riding shotgun? I mean … “Hey baby, guess what? My boys can swim! Aww yeah! So, um, I’ll just swing by the house and drop this off, and be back for you in like an hour?”
WHY DON’T YOU MAKE LIKE A TREE
AND GET OUTTA HERE
I read this news feature the other day about Generation Y and what they’re like in the workplace. Apparently, “the kids” are into getting lots of feedback from managers, they don’t want to pay any dues, and they like to be praised and rewarded all the goddamn time. Hey kid – you do get rewarded. It’s called a fucking paycheck. It ain’t your little “everybody wins” soccer league out here, and I don’t give a shit whether you feel validated or not. Now go tell all your Facebook friends what assholes we X-ers are and get the fuck back to work.
MIXIN UP THE MEDICINE
Why is it the law that we have to speak of the American nineteen-sixties as “turbulent”?
Waiting for the bus this a.m., I saw a guy go by in a tiny little low-slung, obviously brand-new two-seater Porsche convertible. Riding in the passenger side: a garishly-upholstered carseat, correctly strapped in and clearly well-used (no child in it at the moment of sighting). Who in that life situation (parent of very young child) would buy such a vehicle? Well, I know why (DENIAL), but then why use it as the transpo for said child? Aren't those cars manufactured and marketed specifically as cruising vessels for picking up chicks, and wouldn’t it kind of ruin your chick-gathering mojo to have a Cheerio-covered carseat riding shotgun? I mean … “Hey baby, guess what? My boys can swim! Aww yeah! So, um, I’ll just swing by the house and drop this off, and be back for you in like an hour?”
WHY DON’T YOU MAKE LIKE A TREE
AND GET OUTTA HERE
I read this news feature the other day about Generation Y and what they’re like in the workplace. Apparently, “the kids” are into getting lots of feedback from managers, they don’t want to pay any dues, and they like to be praised and rewarded all the goddamn time. Hey kid – you do get rewarded. It’s called a fucking paycheck. It ain’t your little “everybody wins” soccer league out here, and I don’t give a shit whether you feel validated or not. Now go tell all your Facebook friends what assholes we X-ers are and get the fuck back to work.
MIXIN UP THE MEDICINE
Why is it the law that we have to speak of the American nineteen-sixties as “turbulent”?
Labels: cubejammin', I really am sort of an asshole sometimes, indignities of transit, things that are bad for the world
posted by Gleemonex at 2:15 PM
3 Comments:
As I was working on some "culture" work at a company you're very familiar with, we kept talking about how we need to cater to "millennials" and their workplace needs.
It always struck me as odd that big companies are catering to the needs of entitled brats who have yet to prove their worth in the workplace.
THANK YOU! Exactly, man.
The guy with the carseat in the Porsche? He's crusing for MILFS. Nothing a hot mom likes more than a dude with an exepensive car who'll accomodate a kid (or so I'm told.)
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