"Your stepmom's cute." "Shut up, Ted." "Remember when she was a senior and we were freshmen?" "Shut UP, Ted."

Apropos of this post by my homegirl Francine:

Further Instances of Harassment to Which I Have Been Subjected

--The driver's ed teacher who none of the three of us girls wanted to be the last person in the car with. He went ON AND ON about how it was time to trade his wife (the mother of his three young children) in for a younger model, haw haw haw; he wore very short, tight white shorts during all our driving sessions (and mentioned, not infrequently, how "underwear just gets in the way" in his coachly athletic pursuits); he always wanted to stop in at DQ, get a booth, and buy us shakes instead of logging the required road-hours.

--The 6th-grade science teacher who'd run a filmstrip every week or so, during which he'd sit in the back of the room on the corner of his desk, hand jinglin' the change in his pocket. If you know what I mean. And back then I didn't but now I do.

--The boss who insinuated at least twice weekly that if only he weren't married, HOOOOOOO BOY would he and any of several of us younger female employees have a real good time together.

--The bra-strap snapping epidemic of fifth grade, in which for several weeks a group of boys -- the mean, popular ones -- spent literally all of their available time trying to snap our bra straps from the back and from the front. When we complained, the teachers -- all female -- were like, " ... now boys, cool it, mkay."

Good times!