Friday, March 15, 2013

My stuff is stuff, your stuff is shit.

Ugh, this guy, this "Living With Less -- A Lot Less" guy. Not that I don't have the occasional fantasy of moving the fam to Pezenas with nothing but what will fit in the carry-ons, and I will never ever argue the point of having "stuff" just for stuff's sake, but ... come on.

1) We lived in an eensy apartment in SF for six years. It had a Barbie stove and refrigerator, a pocket door to the one bedroom (through which you had to walk to get to the bathroom), and everything had to be organized very carefully, to the point where it was more of a hassle to get out the guitar to practice on it than it was worth. I loved that apartment, our tiny courtyard, the whole life we lived there. But eventually, you get tired of the moving-the-table-out-from-the-wall-so-your-guest-can-also-sit-at-it-for-dinner thing. It feels like a dorm room. (Which, n.b., Mr. Gleemonex and I also did in fact share for a year; my single room in the "new" dorm, with a twin bed, a desk, and a closet. We are pretty good at sharing small spaces, he and I.)

2) WTF is with your need for roommates, bro? Were I a single gal, I'd do whatever it took to have my own place, ALONE. And were I a rich'un like this guy, I'd buy a place that suited my lifestyle, not a series of gigantic historical houses which I had nothing better to do with than fill with roommates and assume the troublesome ass-pain of cutting my own goddamn lawn (have you ever heard of gardening services, dude? They're AWESOME.).

3) This quote: My apartment sleeps four people comfortably; I frequently have dinner parties for 12.I guarantee it's not as comfortable for the other 3-11 people as you think. Particularly with only the one bathroom. 

4) I think it's key that he met an exotic foreign girl and traveled all over, footloose and lightweight -- slumming, roughing it, with nothing but the enormous bank account waiting for him back home -- and that this is what taught him the Life Lesson that less is more. I congratulate him in the way that I congratulate all rich white Americans who did such daring, intrepid, wild things and learned such deep Life Lessons that they can now share with us. 

5) He acts like it's not just the right choice for him but in fact morally superior not to own anything. OK, I don't do gadgets, cause that's not really what turns my crank, but I do have books (so many books!), some clothing, objects of sentimental value from my life, art that makes me happy, devices upon which to listen to music and/or watch TV & movies, a bass guitar and amp, the comfy Cost Plus chair I'm currently blogging from, art supplies, things for my kids (books, furniture, etc.). I don't think I'm hurting anyone with this stuff, and I don't think it's anyone else's lookout what or how much material accompanies me on my journey through life. 

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Blogger Sarah Brown said...

Yeah, this made me roll my eyes too. How lovely that your money-worries-free love jaunt taught you some shit! But I'm still broke and would really like a kitchen table that's not from IKEA, so fuck off.

1:34 PM  
Anonymous Maggie said...

Yeah, I simplified my life back in the day by being poor as hell and living in a studio apartment. Piece of cake not owning a lot of things when you have both no money and no space. I prefer less simple and more comfortable now, thanks.

3:55 PM  
Anonymous Jane Ann said...

"What a dick." - every poor person in America

6:55 AM  
Blogger Gleemonex said...

Yep. Yep. Annnnd yep.

10:53 AM  

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