Monday, April 06, 2009

We asked for Mojo Nixon, they said HE DON'T WORK HERE

Internets, I bought a very pricy Nicole Miller dress the other day (for about $130 from Bluefly.com, heh! only suckers pay full designer price) to wear out to a schmancy dinner with Mr. Gleemonex for our 10th wedding anniversary. The dress was great, but there was this snotty little tag in it with a line drawing and the words:

OUR ZIPPERS ARE INVISIBLE
NOT INDESTRUCTIBLE
PLEASE BE GENTLE
AND TRY ON YOUR
CORRECT SIZE

Well well well, Missus Miller. Do you find there's often a problem with fatties busting the seams of your precious wee creations, causing you to weep hot acid tears onto your concave stinking bosom? Croissant-fondling Shatner, bitch.

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6 Comments:

Blogger francine said...

which is precisely why my future wardrobe will consist soley of $15 maxi dresses from old navy.

10:12 PM  
Blogger Panda!!!! said...

In an admission of my geekiness, I first learnd of Nicole Miller when she designed the wedding dress for Jean Grey. Yes, Jean Grey of the X-MEN comics.

12:37 PM  
Blogger Spanish Johnny said...

Ouch. That was the fourth-meanest Nicole Miller bashing I've heard this week. Well done!

1:02 PM  
Blogger bgirl said...

Heh, love your title!

And I don't use the c-u-next-tuesday word very often or without provocation, but I'm thinking it right this very little second. Honestly, what the hell?

1:59 PM  
Blogger Kingfish said...

I wear Cinch carpenter jeans, uber fatass size (they sell regular fatass), and thare aint no got-damned smart fuckin remark in em.

I use to attend church many moons ago and I remember the contempt I felt towards the fake asshole in the foyer that hands out the bulletin and gives the greeting. Those people dont give two shits if I'm there. Just as long as the check don't bounce, am I right? Anyhoo...This blog is better than that. Thanks.

8:24 PM  
Anonymous Torrey said...

Delurking to say If you ain't got Mojo Nixon then your store could use some fixin...

11:58 AM  

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