Very Loose, Neurotic Confederacy of Dunces
OK, so, Survivor: China looks like it might be a good ‘un. Couple of quick questions, though:
1) Why were these idiots surprised when Probst told them they’d leave for their camps in the clothes they were wearing? Have they never SEEN this show? This is like the 19th iteration, GOD! And why would they be wearing the clothes that they WERE wearing, for international travel in the first place? You want to cart your luggage around, wearing a dress and platform espadrilles? You take a thousand-mile train journey without a bra on? How about some Keens, some comfortable trousers, a functional set of underwear? What the fuck is wrong with you people?
2) Why did the Xtian Broadcaster lady have to get so upset during the welcome/whatever ceremony? If it makes you uncomfortable (you xenophobic twat), why not just say “ehh, this makes me uncomfortable, I’m gonna skip it”? Why start bawling and whining to Probst? He don’t give a flying fuck, lady, and neither do we.
3) Who chooses to self-apply the name “Frosti”? I think I like the guy, but … seriously, “Frosti”?
4) Less of a question, more of a rant: Listen, Miss New York Waitress – first of all, maybe you live in NY, but I call bullshit on you “being from” NY – you look like you mighta been there about a year, maybe six months – you’re trying waaay too hard. Secondly, don’t try to blame your cracked-out irritability and social maladjustment on “being from New York” – you’re just a crabby, lazy bitch, no matter where you were born.
As for favorites at this early date, I’m liking the poker player and the grave digger, and possibly the “gay Mormon flight attendant,” for the long stretch … but don’t go putting money on that because I have historically been TERRIBLE at actually picking the winner. Stupid gutless things always happen to upset my predixx.
1) Why were these idiots surprised when Probst told them they’d leave for their camps in the clothes they were wearing? Have they never SEEN this show? This is like the 19th iteration, GOD! And why would they be wearing the clothes that they WERE wearing, for international travel in the first place? You want to cart your luggage around, wearing a dress and platform espadrilles? You take a thousand-mile train journey without a bra on? How about some Keens, some comfortable trousers, a functional set of underwear? What the fuck is wrong with you people?
2) Why did the Xtian Broadcaster lady have to get so upset during the welcome/whatever ceremony? If it makes you uncomfortable (you xenophobic twat), why not just say “ehh, this makes me uncomfortable, I’m gonna skip it”? Why start bawling and whining to Probst? He don’t give a flying fuck, lady, and neither do we.
3) Who chooses to self-apply the name “Frosti”? I think I like the guy, but … seriously, “Frosti”?
4) Less of a question, more of a rant: Listen, Miss New York Waitress – first of all, maybe you live in NY, but I call bullshit on you “being from” NY – you look like you mighta been there about a year, maybe six months – you’re trying waaay too hard. Secondly, don’t try to blame your cracked-out irritability and social maladjustment on “being from New York” – you’re just a crabby, lazy bitch, no matter where you were born.
As for favorites at this early date, I’m liking the poker player and the grave digger, and possibly the “gay Mormon flight attendant,” for the long stretch … but don’t go putting money on that because I have historically been TERRIBLE at actually picking the winner. Stupid gutless things always happen to upset my predixx.
posted by Gleemonex at 11:49 AM
3 Comments:
THANK YOU!!! I ranted on every single one of those things during the show & my husband told me that I was just being a cranky hater! Glad to know I wasn't the only one!
Do they ever rebroadcast the first show? You're review makes me want to see it now!!
Bethie: if bein a cranky hater is wrong, I don't wanna be right! Besides, you and me? We are correct in our assessments. :-) Half the fun of watching Survivor is in the Judging, no?
Anobiter: They used to rebroadcast it, but I think they don't anymore -- it's plenty early enough to jump in with episode 2 this Thursday evening, though. Only one guy got eliminated, and he was unproductively annoying anyway.
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