Don't do me like that
I mean -- Internets, I was all set to cancel my fam's trip to Texass over Xmas. No offense, Francine (BTW how come I can't see your blog anymore? No love? Invite me, invite me!) -- but the day before this hallucinatory bogmonster shitshow of an election, I was like, If that fucking motherfucker shitweasel assclown wins there's no way I'm going to that redneck backwater piss-head state ever again. They're not getting a GODDAMNED DIME of my godless homo commie librul fascist money and they can fucking SUCK A DICK. My family wants to see me, they can get on a GODDAMNED PLANE and come to CALI-FUCKING-FORNIA where I am FUCKING STAYING FOREVER.
It was violent inside my head, I'm telling you.
And now it's all snickerdoodles and bookstores and things will be Okey-Dokey, y'all. Thank Shatner, whom I never doubted for an instant.